I held out as long as I possibly could on getting a helper. I was determined that I did not need it. I could do it on my own. I didn't want to have that expense. I didn't want to have another woman in the house. I didn't want to navigate all the trickiness I heard other women talking about. I finally hit the wall in November and decided that something had to change in order for me to survive and thrive living in Singapore.
We had two options... 1. Get a car. 2. Get a full time "helper" or maid. I figured either of those two things would increase my happiness and ease the stress of living here. Ironically, the car was WAY more expensive ans so we went with option 2!
Enter Jenny...... It has been almost a month since she has come to live with us. The first night Martin came home and she was in the living room folding clothes and I was in the bath tub. He spent a few minutes chatting with her and came back to our room. He had a panicked frenzied look on his face. I asked him what was wrong and he said, "do you realize I am supporting TWO families now?!" I assured him that just because he found out that she has three children in the Philippines did not change how much we were paying her. That night he felt certain he couldn't do this whole maid thing. That was Monday. By Friday he was handing her a stack of his shirts to be ironed and was praising the invention.
I have had mixed feelings about it... for only a minute. My feelings stem from my strong Mormon work ethic... if you are not ANXIOUSLY engaged there is something wrong. For the past 8+ years I have gone non stop to maintain my home and family. This is the first time that I have actually had the space to sit down. I feel like I am not working hard enough. These feelings have been fleeting and other wonderful things have taken the house works place. Things like, being able to go to the hospital to support a friend, making dinner for friends, being happy to send my husband off to work/church and know I wouldn't see him all day, sitting with my kids and playing... fully engaged, taking my kids out one on one, having time for my spiritual growth, having emotional energy to do the fun Christmas things. It is amazing how much different my cookie decorating has been this year.... instead of freaking out because my kids were making a mess I was able to fully enjoy the experience.
I didn't realize that it really would take two woman working full time to live out my expectations for myself.
The best part of Jenny is that my drawers magically have underwear in them... shirts magically appear in my closet ironed. I feel like a kid again. This is a sort of happiness money really can buy :)
I know this sounds so foreign to most of you. It is a really weird thing. I have decided to embrace it. The whole when in Rome concept. It won't be forever so I will just enjoy the ride!
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ME "helping" Jenny with laundry |
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Happy Birthday Jenny! |
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Ms. Jenny with her BFF Ms. Joyce (my good friends helper!) |